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I got this in an email and nearly died laughing ...and Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!
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I never quite figured out
why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and
then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted
out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to cut me up in little pieces, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

I dont think im getting any tonight either :lol: :lol:
 

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HAHAHAHAHA thats hilarious
 

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Lesson learned. :mrgreen:
 

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OMG, I'm so glad I'm not married to a man like that. Jessie would have held me tight all night long and the next day brought me on a shopping spree of a lifetime, then gave me the bill! wink:
 

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Quill's wife said:
OMG, I'm so glad I'm not married to a man like that. Jessie would have held me tight all night long and the next day brought me on a shopping spree of a lifetime, then gave me the bill! wink:
I want to hear Jesse's take on this one DeeDee.
:lol:
 

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Quill's wife said:
OMG, I'm so glad I'm not married to a man like that.
Say what, you better think about that while your getting me a beer.
Quill's wife said:
Jessie would have held me tight all night long
I thought it was the pillow!
Quill's wife said:
and the next day brought me on a shopping spree of a lifetime
To Costco for a $1.50 dog and drink.
Quill's wife said:
then gave me the bill!
Of course, you never let me have any cash in my wallet. hahaha
 

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Brilliant replies Quill now we know who wears the trousers in your house. :lol: :lol: :lol:
 

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Quill said:
Quill's wife said:
OMG, I'm so glad I'm not married to a man like that.
Say what, you better think about that while your getting me a beer.
Quill's wife said:
Jessie would have held me tight all night long
I thought it was the pillow!
Quill's wife said:
and the next day brought me on a shopping spree of a lifetime
To Costco for a $1.50 dog and drink.
Quill's wife said:
then gave me the bill!
Of course, you never let me have any cash in my wallet. hahaha
AWESOME JESSE! :D

now you better go run and hide with your tail between your legs before DeeDee reads this :lol:
 
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